A little bit of younger, simpler, days have been slipping into my thoughts, and I am okay with saying, I have been doing quite a lot of daydreaming. I drive somewhere and wonder if I even bothered to stop at lights or stop signs because my mind had been wandering. I start a thought to someone and am embarrassed, because at the second or third word in, I am off on another thought of my younger life.
Once upon a time, there was a young girl. She was proud of the fact that she could run faster than the boys, climb as far up in the trees and feel them sway, hang from the monkey bars until she was positive all the blood in her entire body had drained in to her head, She would get on the swings and go so high, that she became air born and flew into the clouds! She would play kick ball, dodge ball, double jump rope, king of the hill, and finish off the evening catching lightening bugs. She could twirl her baton in the backyard until she was almost a baton twirling pro. She wouldn’t just roller skate or exercise. She would roller skate and exercise until she dropped. She would drop. Drop right onto the grass and look up at the beautiful blue sky and gaze at how miraculous it was. How miraculously different it was each and every second. She was afraid of water, so she made herself dive and do back flips into the pool and swim until she was exhausted. She was most proud of skinned knees! She rode her bike and could definitely yell out, “Look! No hands.”
These times were so simple, so slowed down. I would go to school, play, read, help my mom keep the house spotless, eat an amazing home-cooked meal, and rush to get outside before it got dark. Bath time felt like an hour long luxury, but I do believe it was because I was winding down. I would pray, and crawl under the covers and just know that I was never going to fall asleep.
I grew up and I try to do some of these things and keep the same speed and agility. Can not quite do some of them without aches,pains, and a little nausea! And I think about once upon a time, because I let it get away from me. I let time fly to fast. I forgot how to just play. Just gaze at the sky. How to be young with no adult pressure, no daily stress.
Every day I am feeling the energy that the little girl in me did not waste. I am exercising more. I am stopping and gazing at a flower, breathing in it’s beauty, I am eating more vegetables and fruit, I am trying to let down, get away from the mean and hateful, and laugh and smile more.
Right now, I am proud of that little girl. Later in life, when I really can not do any of what she did and I am just able to sit and rock in my chair, look out a window, can barely hear or see, I want to be proud of the grown woman I became. How I loved and encouraged. How I reached out to others. How I cheered. How I laughed and cried. How I stepped out, took a challenge. Enjoyed every single day of my life. How I prayed for everyone and shared my faith. How I opened my arms and hugged people tight. How I smiled and put up an amazing fight to get through any tragedy in life. Look up in the sky and know I had a great life.