The life I have, and have had, is just beautiful. I have always loved being a momma, wife, daughter, and friend. I am so thankful. I have noticed there are stages, as a family, we have to climb up and get through to graduate to the next. Sometimes, I slow down, fall, or stop, but never quit and don’t plan to. Each day of my life, since I have had our first child, has been very full of love, bills, work, stress, tears, fun & laughter. We added prayer to our to-do list and gave all our worries each morning, at supper, and at bedtime to the Lord. Our life together, as a big family, has been very rich.
As we dwindled down to two, I felt empty, and then lost. Empty, because I loved hearing their voices and laughter in the house, and lost, because I would not have them around to mommy them. School schedules, swimming, sports, doctor appointments, working, rushing to the store, making homemade meals each night, prayer and bedtime. Then doing it all over again, and again. I went over being a mother and felt like I had tried so hard to be the very best. I loved each one of our children so much and the same. I never had a favorite child. I loved how they were each different. If I went back in time, I would add in more cooking with them, teaching them further than the basic recipes. I would play more classical music and insist they each learn notes and try their hand at a musical instrument. I would have longer, daily reading time. (WHERE I could see them and WHAT they were reading). LOL I would provide more and better materials for writing, and their artwork. We would find something new to learn every single day. I would stop everything and play more.
I have always told each one of them how proud I am of them. So, as my time having each one in our home, has ended, I tried to think of a way to stay connected. I pray daily for each one, and their new young families. I still encourage them and tell them I love them and that I am proud of them. I listen to each new plan they have and smile as much as possible. (Even if I begin to worry about this new direction they are headed). I exercise more and eat better so I can hopefully be healthier for them when I am older. I try to stay up on new technology, songs, books, and movies. But I still might be considered a dinosaur! I love them so much and I keep them in my prayers. I picture the future, the up’s and down’s, and I try to stay strong. Trying to stay strong, keeping the path open, if they need me. Standing here,trying to stay connected.